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{3                   Huumoria: Star Trek - The Amiga Generation
{3                   ------------------------------------------

[This episode deals mainly with Picard's attempts to  come  to  terms  with  the
revelation that Q is his true, long lost, mother, adopted by the Continuum  when
he was but a child, and still had hair. However, to prove that this is not  just
a space soap opera, but actually a highly technical futuristic series, the  crew
will also have to deal with a world on the verge of disaster.

When we join this episode, the Enterprise  is  hovering  above  a  solid  yellow
planet which is similar in looks to many other planets.]

Sitting down with a cup of Earl Jones tea, for that deep voice  effect,  captain
Gen-Lock Picard listened to the summary La-Forge has prepared.

"...planet Commodore  is  therefore  completely  dry.  The  ecological  disaster
brought by president Ali could cause the death of the entire Amigan  population.
Natural reproduction has stopped completely, and there isn't even  enough  water
for a floor scrubber to work."

Shock registered on the faces of all scrubber loving crew members.

"Are there any large underground water deposits? We could then use  the  phasers
to solve the problem, as we did in the past."

"I'm sorry, but we just can't use the same solution in two episodes. We'll  look
as if we learn from experience.

"On the other hand, work had already started  more  than  half  a  year  ago  to
produce water using a concept similar to the one  used  by  our  replicator.  By
using the Liquidators, as they are called, the Amigans have hoped to  solve  the
problem. Unfortunately, the process is taking longer than anticipated."

"Ohhhhh," cried Deanna suddenly, clutching her head.

"Deanna, are you okay?"

"I just felt a fluctuation in the Force, Lock, as if  millions  of  people  have
suddenly lost the will to be creative individuals, and decided to join the great
unwashed masses."

"With this lack of water, it is no wonder they cannot get bathed, captain."

"Oh, shut up, Data. This is a serious matter. What does it mean, Deanna?"

"Oh no, the voices, the voices, oh, what a world, what a world!"

"I know what's happening."

"Guinan, what are you doing here?"

"I felt that disturbance in the Force, too. It's the Borg."

"What have they done this time? Destroyed another couple of worlds?"

"It's worse. They are life long enemies of the Amigans. The Amigans' slogan  was
'have an Amiga, have a friend', while the Borg's one was  'assimilate  or  die'.
This battle of the slogans has gone on for ages.

"Now with the weakening of the Amigans, the Borg  manage  to  assimilate  people
much more easily, with the use of their new slogan  'join  the  Incredible  Borg
Monopoly world, and get built-in networking'."

"That's terrible. Perhaps my mother will be able to do something."

[The episode continues with Picard trying to find out whether the records  about
his mother confirm what the Q had so convincingly claimed, and  talking  to  his
step mother, simulated by the holo-deck. Eventually, his love-hate  relationship
with the Q convinces him that the Q is really his mother.

At the end of the episode we find out that the whole episode was staged  by  the
Q, including falsifying records,  and  simulating  Picard's  mother  simulation.
Commodore's problems were just added by the Q so that he doesn't get  completely
bored.

Not much of a conclusion, is it? But then, what do you expect from Star  Trek  -
The Boring Generation?]