Date: Saturday, May 13, 1995
From: Dave Arnett, Hardware Design Engineer
  Re: Re: WARNING: hp48G memory upgrades for new models                    

[Every so often somebody posts something on the HP48 newsgroup which
is so funny that it makes me cry.  Here's one that did it, written by
a member of the HP48 design team.  -jkh-]


dqua@earthlink.net (Derick J.R. Qua-Gonzalez) wrote: 
>In article <3ounco$a8v@nic.umass.edu>, KLOTZ@phobos.oit.umass.edu (Jay Klotz)
>says:
>> 
>> [snip] The first two digits (if I 
>>remember correctly) give the week of the year (HP's year, that is - 
>>after 1 Nov or something like that), and the next two digits give  
>>the number of years after 1972, which, again if I remember correctly 
>>is the first year HP started making calculators. 
>> [snip II]
> 
>I don't think that's quite accurate, because my GX's serial number 
>is #3403S03584. By the above, it would have been manufactured in 
>the 34th week of the HP year after 1972+3=1975---before the HP~28 
>was even produced! 
 
Actually, we began producing HP28s in 1967, right after my second  
birthday.  It was part of a 1960's beat-back-the-commies program 
operating under the auspices of the CIA amd the Federal Reserve  
Banking System, where promising toddlers were given an accelerated  
eduaction and turned into engineers before their third birthdays. 
The thinking by noted child psychologist Dr. Ninjamin Sprokc, was 
that raw intelligence decays with age and so our nation's best  
thinking would come from infants and toddlers.  For proof, look 
at domestic policies for the past three decades. 
 
Anyway, the first 28s flew on later Apollo missions.  The Apollo 
crew members were under strict orders not to have any of them 
visible when the cameras were on.  In fact, there is an HP28 still 
on the surface of the moon transmitting data home via a non-crippled 
IR circuit.  (All that stuff about the receiver being the weak part 
of the system is a well-executed diversionary tactic.)  Flight  
navigation for most of the Gemini and Apollo missions was done 
with a 12C. 
 
Some of you may remember that one of the first Shuttle launches  
was delayed because the on-board computers had a communication  
problem.  That was a design flaw.  You see, NASA didn't want all  
five of the flight computers to be identical machines.  So we 
made one a 48S, one a 48SX, one a 48G, and one a 48GX.  In  
desperation, we made the last computer a TI.  The communication
problem arose when the 48 machines, with all their extra time,  
began a Tetris competition.  The TI felt left out, and decided 
to sulk. 
 
>  Well, okay, maybe HP developed all this techno- 
>logy in the 60's and was just hoarding it...its a conspiracy, I tell 
>you, a conspiracy!  Along with the UFO's they have, the cure for 
>all diseases, but they won't release them!!  :-)  :-) 
> 
 
I don't know how you found out about the UFOs.  I didn't 
think that information had been made public yet.  But I can 
supply a very good reason why we haven't released all of the 
cures yet.  The cures, as a complete set, are sufficient to end 
not only all current infectious diseases, but all the possible
genetic mutations of the various germs and bacterii.  It would 
be a real shame to release the cures when so very few of the  
possible mutations have occurred, because nobody would be able 
to appreciate the true genius of our work.  So we are currently
trying to develop a means of increasing the mutation rate,   
thereby allowing the cures to be realeased sooner.  Plese do not  
become impatient.  The work should be complete in most of your  
lifetimes.  Well, at least during what WOULD have been your 
lifetimes. 
 
Good Day! 
Dave. 
 
--- 
I don't speak for NASA, NIH, the present Administration,  
or HP when I post here.   :)